Random Thoughts and Interoffice Politics

Now that I’m in this weird middle management position, where I’m the Lead of my department, I’m discovering a lot more about inter office politics. I’m balanced between two worlds-the worker bees and the administrators. It’s an awkward place to be and I see both sides, but I also see the ugly parts.

Sometimes my favorite part of the job is hanging out with the cool Electrician vendors I work with.

Some days the mundane tasks bring me the most joy, like setting up a computer for a pumping mama so she’s more comfortable when she pumps her milk during her lunch break.

Shared workspace and open offices are really, really stupid, especially when you’re constantly bombarded with questions all day. Also putting in earbuds doesn’t seem to help when you’re trying to concentrate. I wish I had an office. Or even a storage closet!

Teaching my staff how to be decent humans is really challenging. They are sooo awkward. The whole awkward IT people is a stereotype for a reason.

Some days I really miss being a stay at home spouse and mama. Other days I love the challenges. Today I’m just super excited that it’s Friday.

Updating Our Artwork

Our home has an ocean vibe. Both Match and I love being near the coast. If we could afford to live by the beach, we would in a heartbeat. So in our home, we’ve surrounded ourselves with coastal colors and a beach feel.

I’ve been wanting to get an ocean print for our wall for awhile now, but I had to find the right picture. I took this photo on our recent trip to the coast back in September.

I ordered a canvas print on http://www.canvaspress.com It was really easy to use I’ve ordered canvas prints before and they take a long time to load the preview. Their site was fast and checkout was painless. I’m so excited for it to ship! I’m hoping to put it on this wall in our entryway.

I’ll post a photo when  it arrives. I also really need to do something about that ugly air intake grate. One thing at a time.

Piglet’s Big Boy Bunkbed

Piglet got his very own bunkbed! I was able to score an amazing deal from my zumba friend who was practically giving it away on Facebook. Actually she was giving it away, but I told her that I had to pay her something, since this bed was way too nice to get for free. All solid wood, no particle board or laminate! I ended up giving her $50 and I still can’t believe we scored it for so cheap.

He absolutely loves it. He calls it his fort. He insisted we keep his train table in the room too, which meant that the rocking chair had to go. Sniff. I was a bit broken hearted. He’s had his glider in his room since before he was born. It’s now in our living room, and he still curls up with me in it, but it’s different somehow. We snuggle on his bed to read books now, and once we get the full sized mattress, that’ll be a cozy spot for the three of us. I can already picture the sleepovers he’ll have one day. Little boys being all crazy, playing on the bunkbed. He’s growing up so fast! But I love each new chapter. Though I’m still having a hard time with the rocking chair.

 

2018 To Do List

The results are in for 2017’s To Do List. I wasn’t able to accomplish everything, but overall I think it was a pretty productive year, especially considering how busy work was this past year.

2017 Goals/To Do List:

Financial:

  • Save up for an SUV or all wheel drive vehicle (used, preferably something that can handle all the rough weather we get up here)  I got my super cute RAV4. I LOVE it! 
  • Save for a family trip, ideally to the Gorge  We didn’t go to the Gorge, but our family trip to Newport was amazing.
  • Start contributing to our IRA accounts again

Personal Growth:

  • Get the lead promotion this summer when my manager retires
  • Get Project + Certification
  • Go to the Gym at least 2x per week, walk the dog, wrestle Piglet, or do a workout video on other days. Goal is to lose 10 pounds, but really just get back to feeling fit. (I did work out at least 2x per week, but I also ate a ton of junk at work. I didn’t gain too much, but I definitely didn’t lose any weight.)

Travel and Family Adventures:

  • Visit the Gorge
  • Take a family trip, just the three of us, not to see family, but just for us We went to Newport, and it was such a fun weekend. I’m realizing I never blogged about it, which is super sad. We went to the aquarium, the beach, and just relaxed together.
  • Visit our California family this summer
  • Hike Silver Falls

Home DIY & Crafts:

  • Build shed
  • Build porch swing  I made my own bench instead 
  • Build built in dressers or storage in master.  I still really want to do this!
  • Landscape the yard
  • Plant a garden

Here’s my list for the new year.

2018 Goals/To Do List:

Financial:

  • Save up for a trip to Hawaii and set a date to go.
  • Pay down car loan.
  • Start investing for Piglet.

Personal Growth:

  • Take part in a 30 day fitness challenge
    • Goal is to get back to Driver’s License weight by the end of the new year
  • Learn how to play at least one song on the keyboard
    • Ideally take a course someday to learn more, but I’ll be happy if I can just learn one for now.
  • Take a leadership training course

Travel and Family Adventures:

  • Visit our California family/friends
  • Go on a trip to the snow
  • Go camping with friends
  • Visit the Gorge (someday we will finally do this)
  • Go on a family train ride
  • Take a trip to Hawaii

Home DIY & Crafts:

  • Build built in dressers or storage in master
  • Build a printer cover
  • Night stand for guest room or filing cabinet cover
  • Paint the exterior of the house
  • Finish mixbook for 2017, update the 2018 book regularly.

Couples Counseling

Carrie: [about therapists] First they want you to come there two times a week, then three times a week, and eventually you’re starting every sentence with ‘my therapist says… ‘

Miranda: ” My therapist says that’s a very common fear.” -Sex and the City

Match and I have started couples counseling. I’m actually super excited about this, as we have started this proactively, as a way to keep a healthy relationship. Match has always struggled with depression, and it has definitely affected our relationship. When he’s feeling good, our relationship is so strong, and I have zero complaints. He’s an amazing father, wonderful husband and partner. He cooks, cleans and helps out with all household duties with minimal complaint.

But then there are the down days. He loses his temper. He never hits, but he has thrown things (again never at either of us) and overall just no fun to be around. He hates that he gets this way, and the good news is, he sees it. I’m not perfect by any stretch. I lose my temper right back, I swear like a sailor when I’m angry at him, and then I nag him incessantly. What’s wrong, just snap out of it, etc. All the while in no way helping someone who cannot “snap out of it” and isn’t trying to be this way.

Match was always against counseling, instead just trying to pull himself out if it, and seeking ways to improve his mood. He goes to the gym, he takes St. John’s Wart, and other homeopathic supplements. I’ve also tried to make a conscious effort to ignore the storm cloud moods. I try not to nag, and while I do make sure he pulls his weight around the house, I try not to force my cheerfulness on him. These do seem to help, but I think the issue is bigger than either of us.

Match finally opened up to me and said he’s tired of feeling sad, and he doesn’t want to be a bad example to Piglet. He wants to not be so quick to anger, and he wants to be sure we’re solid as a couple. So we found a counselor, and we’ve started some talk therapy. So far we’ve only had one session, but I’m optimistic. I am so grateful that Match is willing to work on issues, because I know most men just shut down emotionally. I’m so glad that he’s ready to make changes, and I’m hopeful he can get to a place where he can conquer his depression, rather than just putting on a show for mine and Piglet’s benefit. Besides Piglet, he is the most important person in my life, and I just want to see him happy. It’s my default setting, and I want it to be his too.

How about you dear readers? Any of you go through couples or even individual counseling? I did individual counseling in college for awhile, and I found it pretty helpful. This is my first experience going as a couple. I think it’s long overdue, especially with all we went through with losing Roo. I hope we can both gain wisdom from this experience, and most of all I hope it brings us even closer.