What I’ll never get is why you could open your heart to someone who broke it into pieces but you couldn’t open it to someone who just wanted to heal it.-Marin, Men in Trees

I love how lately when I get home from work Match Guy is there waiting for me with a warm smile and a big hug. It is such a great end to a long day. Yesterday when I came home he grabbed me and said, “Do you know you’re amazing and that every day I like you more and more?” He always does that, with the sweet things to say.

Since I’ve been over here on Cloud 9 with lilies and happy thoughts abounding, I got to thinking about my past. As bad as guys have been before Match, without them I would never have fully understood just how great this guy really is. I know most of my readers seem to enjoy my sappy gushings about how great Match Guy is, I’m sure a little spice won’t hurt either. So for today’s entry, I think I’ll take a little trip down memory lane. (more…)

There’s an old saying, “What you don’t know can’t hurt you.” But is that really true? Or can the things not said today haunt you tomorrow? Everyone knows the truth can be painful. But it can also set you free. It’s a risk you take whenever you open yourself up to someone. I, for one, think that honesty is worth it. And who knows? You just might be pleasantly surprised.-Marin, Men in Trees

I still can’t believe it’s only been a week since I met Match for the first time. We have spent almost every day together since, and it just keeps getting better. Of course as with everything in real life, there are snags, hiccups, or bubble bursters. On Sunday I ran into my first snag with Match Guy.

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We all have emotional boundaries that we set for ourselves but, all too often, we cross them. With authority and repetition, we can train animals to think and act a certain way. What about when it comes to ourselves? Can we train our emotions to sit and stay?-Marin, Men in Trees

Sunday made it exactly one week since I had last spoken to Birthday Twin. One week with not so much as a drunk dial or a text message. I was proud of myself for staying strong and waiting for him. The last time we talked, he told me that when he gets his anxiety attacks he withdraws from everyone, and that it isn’t personal. He said that when I don’t hear from him to please not be upset, and it has nothing to do with me. That doesn’t stop me from being so frustrated I could scream. It doesn’t stop me from missing him when he’s gone.

I went to church alone Sunday morning, it was only my second time going. I felt that familiar empty feeling when I watched as the couples came in, two by two. I had so much fun with BT being there last week and it really bugged me that I cared so much. I hate it when I start getting down about being alone when there are so many great things about being single. I love my independence, my freedom to do whatever I want for the day. Still, as I sat there I looked at couples holding hands, or husbands absentmindedly rubbing their wives necks while the preacher talked and I just couldn’t help thinking, I want that. I have this fabulous life, and I just want someone to share it with. I don’t think that’s much to ask. I don’t need a boyfriend, I just want one.

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Regret is a funny thing. You try your best in life to avoid it. But sometimes it’s the hard things in life that teach us the most… which makes you wonder, if given the chance, how many of us would do things differently. For some, regret is the very thing that helps us push past our fear and move into the future. For others, it’s the thing that allows us to re-explore out past. At its best, regret can be the catalyst for a new beginning, where anything and everything is still possible.-Marin, Men in Trees

Last week was a very emotional week for me. I don’t know what was going on but I felt like crying at the drop of a hat. I think part of it was work was frustrating and stressful, but I also think it was my dating life. Things with the Potential Guy went from confusing to downright annoying. To top it off, I kind of lost it with Birthday Twin because I just wanted to have him call me, and I was sick of waiting around for him. This week I just had enough of the games from both of these guys, and enough of the maybe we should, maybe we shouldn’ts. I was just DONE. So Wednesday night everything just exploded.

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They say patience is a virtue and, like most virtues, we don’t know if we possess it until it’s been tested. If we are lucky, we have someone to take that test with us. And if we can pass that test, if we can wait long enough, we just might find the reward greater than we ever expected. The funny thing about waiting is it always seems the more we want something the longer we have to wait for it. Deciding to wait out the long haul shouldn’t be taken lightly, but it is an easier decision to live with than others.-Marin, Men in Trees

Well the back and forth with the Potential Guy continues. We were supposed to hang out Sunday and instead of a phone call, I got a text from him flaking on me. I was so frustrated and annoyed that I didn’t bother to respond. I felt like Off Limits was so right-he was just not that into me. He keeps stringing me along and I’m tired of it. So Monday I got a really apologetic text from PG along with a voice mail asking me to please call him back and hoping I wasn’t mad at him.

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