Womancing the Girl

Cameron [about him and Gloria]: On paper we should be good friends, one spicy curvy diva.
Mitchell: And Gloria. –Modern Family

Last night I had Geeky over for wine and dessert. Match teased me that I was romancing the new friendship. “What do you mean it’s weird that I’m making chocolate covered strawberries and serving red wine to my new gal pal?” I said. When Geeky came over the first she said was that her boyfriend, her Fireman Guy said he better take notes on how to romance from me! Ha! Continue reading Womancing the Girl

Missing Close Friendships

Did you ever once show me any friendship? Ever ask my help in a personal problem? Include me in one of your little bull sessions? Can you imagine how it feels to walk by this tent and… (She gasps and breaks down)…hear your laughter and know that I’m not welcome? When did one of you ever even offer me a lousy cup of coffee?! -Margaret, M*A*S*H

Last night I offered to cook dinner for Couple Friends. I had this idea in my head that they would come over to our place and have dinner, maybe play games or just drink wine and talk. Couple Hubby and Match decided they wanted to watch the Nascar race that CH had recorded the day before on his DVR. So dinner got moved to Couple Friends’ house. I thought it would still be a good time, because Couple Wife and I could gab in the kitchen while the men watched sports. I was really looking forward to a girl’s chat, and had been really needing one for the past few weeks. Little did I know that my innocent offer to cook would make me Kitchen Slave while Couple Friends and Match relaxed on the couch watching the race.

I tried not to be bummed, but I couldn’t help feeling left out while they sat there relaxing and I was slaving away in the kitchen. Match even came into the kitchen a few times to give me kisses and ask how I was doing. He could tell I was a bit let down, but he couldn’t fix it. What was I supposed to do? Demand that CW come hang out with me? I knew that would be juvenile. Still, I guess I just hoped that since we hadn’t seen each other in a few weeks that she would want to.  I called Coast Sister the next day to tell her about it, because I knew she would understand. We’re a lot alike, and if it had been us having a friend cook in our house, we’d be in the kitchen asking if we could help. In her defense, CW did offer to help, but she did so with a half heartedness that suggested she just wanted to stay where she was. I don’t blame her in a way, it is nice to have someone do all the work, and she’s a new mom, and probably tired most of the time. I can’t pretend to know what that’s like. Still, I couldn’t help being a little let down by the evening.

At work today, I started thinking about how even though Couple Wife is always so friendly, she rarely goes out of her way to invite me to anything. Back in October, both Match and I were both anticipating Halloween invitations to different parties, and hoping to hang out with Couple Friends. As some of my faithful readers know, we were never invited. Then Christmas and New Years came and went without an invitation to the many parties they frequented.  Then there are the few times I’ve asked her to go on walks, or go for a cup of coffee. She does so, but I just wish it was reciprocated sometimes. I know she has a lot of friends, and sometimes I get the feeling she just doesn’t have room for anymore, at least not on a closer level.

I miss my Coast Sister and I’m so grateful she’s available via IMs, texts, and phone calls. Still, it would be so nice if she lived in the same town. I miss Reality Check at times, the old RC who I could talk to and laugh with, or just go on a walk with. I miss Brazil, who is now in total Mommy mode (I know she’ll come around eventually, but let’s face it, she’s a mom, she’s changed). I miss Personality Twin and her crazy stories. Maybe I just need to make a visit out to the East Coast to see CS. If only I had the vacation time! And maybe I just need to give Couple Wife time. Maybe like me she’s been burned by friends so she takes awhile to let someone get close. And maybe like Match said, she just had an off day. All I know is I am going to let her be the one to invite me to do something next. If she never does, well then I guess I have my answer eh?

How about you girls? Do any of you have trouble maintaining close girl friendships? Why does it seem to be harder the older we get?

I Love You Woman

That’s why it’s always nice when someone takes the time to reach out and befriend you. -JD, Scrubs

Tuesday nights have become movie night for me and Brazil since Match has class that night, and her husband is off at college during the week. I love getting to spend that time together, even though I know when the baby comes we probably won’t get together quite as much. We went to see I Love You Man, and I thought it was hilarious. I really identified with Paul Rudd’s character Peter, because I have a hard time making new girl friends. I feel like if I approach a girl at the gym to hang out, she’ll think I’m hitting on her or something. While I do have a few great girlfriends, we don’t hang out as often as I would like. Having Coast Sister visit made me realize just how much I miss having a close friend to hang out with regularly. Continue reading I Love You Woman

Good Old Fashioned Girl Talk

Carlene: Oh, Mary Jo. You are just the best girlfriend I’ve ever had! I mean it! If you were a man I’d marry you. I would!(pondering) But Julia, you know what . . . I would find you very attractive too. It would be a tough decision . . . Mary Jo or Julia. I can’t decide! Allison, what do you think?
Allison: I think you need a date” bad!!
Carlene: You think so?
Mary Jo: Oh, don’t pay any attention to her. She’s just mad because none of us want to marry her
Designing Women

These past few months I’ve been really missing having a good girlfriend to hang out with. Coast Sister is by far my best gal pal, but unfortunately she lives across the country (come on Coast Guard, make her hubby get stationed in CA!!). I was really missing having someone here to do things with, like go see chick flicks or just sit around and girl talk. 

Saturday morning Couple Wife took me up on my suggestion to go for a walk in the park near our houses. We started by making a pit stop at Starbucks, which jump started the morning. I can’t remember the last time I’d gone for coffee with a friend, and it was so nice. Then we hiked all over the park, which was impressive given she’s 9 months pregnant. Part of the walk idea was to see if we could speed along the arrival of Couple Baby. He’s due this week, so we were hoping to jump start labor.

While we didn’t get her water to break, we did have a great time talking. We have always gotten together with Match and Couple Hubby in tow, so we didn’t get a chance to get to know one another. She’s a lot like me, and Coast Sister for that matter (if we got in a room together, I’m sure we’d sound like hens, the way we can talk, ha). We talked about everything, from how her relationship began with Couple Hubby, to going through loss with him when his mom died from asbestos poisoning. Couple Hubby also lost his dad soon after, isn’t that so sad? So as a couple they’ve been through so much together, and have had to grow up fast.

Couple Wife is a little bit younger than me, but she’s an old soul like I am, so we click. We ended up losing track of time and chatted for 3 hours! I really needed that girl time, because as much as I love Match, sometimes it’s good to talk to someone that knows what I’m feeling. Match knows and understands me better than anyone, but he’s still a man, so he doesn’t quite get everything, and honestly I don’t need him to. It’s good to have girlfriends that can be there, to vent to, to gush to and daydream about all the what ifs, and just to laugh with. I’m hoping that we get together more often, and hopefully grow closer as friends.

Reuniting with my Personality Twin

I’m not mad that your sleeping with Sloan. I’m mad that you didn’t tell me that your sleeping with Sloan. I’m mad at you. Because instead of telling me and admitting that your one of those girls who goes all pouffy when she gets a boyfriend, you disappear with your thing. (She walks away but stops) I don’t make friends easily. -Erica, Grey’s Anatomy

Ahhhh I’m sooo excited! Personality Twin is coming to town this Saturday! I haven’t seen her in so long, wow…She hasn’t even met Match yet! I can’t wait for them to meet, I know she’s gonna love him.

I’ve got our night all planned out-we’re going to karaoke it up at our favorite spot. It has a stripper pole for PT to dance around while I sing, haha! Before going out, we’re gonna spend the afternoon hanging out while Match is at class, which is perfect. We need some time to catch up and be girly before he comes home.

Continue reading Reuniting with my Personality Twin