My First Turkey

Happy belated Thanksgiving! It was a crazy, busy holiday, as they always are. This year we hosted at our new home. This seems to be our pattern-we buy a house, and then we host Thanksgiving. I love hosting! Here’s me and my cousin’s girlfriend, all cheerful in the kitchen.

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We invited my cousins, aunt, uncle, brother and his fiancee over for the holiday. My aunt was going to cook the turkey. At the last minute, my uncle came down with the flu so they had to stay home. She sent the turkey along with my cousin, and said I could do it. I was nervous but kind of excited about it! I asked my brother’s fiancee if she would help me with the turkey, since it was my first.  I never heard back from her, and since she’s a flake, I went ahead and made the turkey according to some advice from another friend who was there. I didn’t think anything of it, and when they strolled in just a few hours before dinner, she went off on me for not letting her make the turkey. In my home. Where I was hosting Thanksgiving. It was crazy weird.

I said I was very sorry for the misunderstanding, and that I never asked for her to cook it, just to help, and that she was welcome to sit back and relax. Mind you, they were the last ones there, so by no means were they early. Apparently, in her world, they were “hours” too early, and she proceeded to pout. The.entire.day. Like a teenage girl. She sulked in a chair, not talking to anyone, except to grunt hello, and then kept disappearing into another room. It was super awkward.

They left early, after she made rude remarks to me, after I profusely thanked her for the side dishes she brought. She didn’t once thank me for hosting, for opening my home to her. Everyone was pretty horrified that this new person to the family would be such a raging bitch. I even took my brother aside and asked him if he could talk to her, and get her to lighten up. He jumped to her defense, and the next day, even told me I owed her an apology. I’m like, um…pretty sure she owed all of us an apology for being super rude.

The minute she left, we all breathed a collected sigh of relief, and managed to have a fun evening of playing cards against humanity.

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I’m so sad about the silly, needless drama with my future sister-in-law. I have serious doubts about her as a person, (there are so many other issues, drug abuse being high on the list, which explains her irrational anger) but I’m mostly disappointed in my brother, that he would allow this person to come into my house and treat me like garbage, especially over a misunderstanding. I was nothing but nice to her, and apparently that wasn’t enough. I guess it wouldn’t be a holiday event without some sort of drama.

But it was still a nice holiday, and I’m so thankful for everything we have. The visit with my cousins was amazing, and I’m so glad to be getting to know them as adults. Our friends C&M came over too, and I love how close we’ve gotten to them. They were comic relief for me while dealing with the brother’s fiancee drama. C dubbed her “turkey penis” and now it’s our inside joke.

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But most of all I’m thankful for my boys, and this lovely life we’ve made together. Piglet told us about his thankful tree that they made at daycare. I asked him what he was thankful for, and he said, “I’m thankful for you and daddy. ” I love that sweet boy!

 

Talk to Us Tuesday-Deputy Wives and Drama

She’s this amazing girl one minute and then this raging jealous freak the next.-Matt, The Vampire Diaries

Today I’m checking in with my two favorite blog girl friends Impulsive Addict and Seriously Shawn. I really need an ear today guys. I’m struggling with a big issue in the world of Law Enforcement spouses: drama, trust and jealousy issues.

The other night I had Walking Buddy and another new deputy wife friend over for the evening. We were having a really great time visiting and hanging out with their babies. Everything was great, until one of the wives mentioned her fears about a coworker of our husbands. Her and Walking Buddy got all upset about their men even so much as talking to this coworker, and were really fired up about it. As they were talking, I felt like they were dragging me into their world of mistrust. They even tried to get me upset because she asked one of the husband’s for Match’s phone number.

Now I trust Match 100%. But you remember when I had to deal with the slutty girl who kept hanging all over Match during academy? So I’m familiar with that feeling of uncertainty. As the wives said, they trust their men completely, it’s the women they don’t trust. I am familiar with horrible women who prey on married men. But at the end of the day we have to trust our men don’t we?

I know Match loves me no matter what. Even if my weight balloons up and I’m shopping for plus size dresses at sydneyscloset, and I know he’ll only have eyes for me. In fact he’s been more than understanding of the guy friends I’ve had in the past. So I try to extend the same courtesy. He always tells me everything, and I never have to wonder if he’s holding back.

I’m just sad that I let these girls get to me, and made me have feelings of doubt that night. The next day I talked about it all with Match, and we were both pretty bummed out. I really like these girls, and I was hoping to become good girlfriends. But it’s hard to be around girls who are so insecure and cause so much drama. They don’t even want their husbands talking to girls at work, even though it’s part of their JOB. I think it’s important to have comradeship among his colleagues, and if that means female coworkers, so be it. He will have times where he has to depend on these people for his life, and I want to be sure they’re looking out for him.

I also think by getting mad at their husbands, these wives are inadvertently pushing their husbands to lie. They’re basically making them afraid to even mention female coworkers for fear of backlash. I don’t want Match to ever feel that he has to hold anything back from me. I don’t mind him having female friends as long as I remain his best friend. He also knows there are boundaries. Going to lunch one on one with the same female coworker all the time isn’t appropriate, but talking during their shift or hanging out in groups is just fine.

My way of dealing with this new girl is to invite her to our house for Match’s birthday next week. I feel that knowing someone keeps me from wondering about them, and usually puts all fears to rest. Hopefully these deputy wives won’t mind that she’s there.

What are your thoughts on this? Do you have friends who are insecure about their husbands and other females? How do you stop yourself from falling into the drama trap right along with them?

New Year’s Eve & Drama the Bitch

Max: Awww, this is the worst party ever.
Marge: Remember that New Year’s Eve party at Lenny’s? He didn’t even have a clock. –The Simpsons

New Year’s Eve this year was interesting. We started the night off by going to Match’s aunt’s house to celebrate with his parents, aunt and uncle and a few family friends. The food was delicious and the evening had a nice classy vibe. Everyone said their congratulations to us and it was so nice to receive such a warm welcome. My only complaint was that we dropped the ring off at the jeweler to be resized and he said it would take TWO WEEKS to get it back. I told the jeweler he should give out loaner rings to us newly engaged ladies because otherwise it’s just plain cruel. He laughed but I wasn’t joking.

Continue reading New Year’s Eve & Drama the Bitch

Drama’s Breakup and Girl’s Night Out

Meredith: You should take something.
Cristina: Drugs are for babies.
Izzie: I hate Alex.
Cristina: And the non sequitur award goes to…
Izzie: I’m sorry, I hate Alex.
Meredith: I broke up with Derek.
Cristina: Burke wants to have a relationship.
Izzie: Boys are stupid.
Cristina: Yep.                                                                                                                    –Grey’s Anatomy

Drama Chick called me on Thursday afternoon bawling her eyes out. Turns out that B broke up with her, completely out of the blue. As much as I think they weren’t right for each other, it’s still super sad, and my heart broke for her. Continue reading Drama’s Breakup and Girl’s Night Out

Gym Buddy or Insecure Cling-on?

How is it that no man understands that every woman, whether she’s sixteen or sixty, still has that awkward, insecure, self-conscious teenage girl inside of her? -Elliot, Scrubs

Lately I’ve started getting into a consistent gym routine. I’m taking these classes that are really starting to help, and I’m noticing a difference. I’m feeling healthier and happier too. So having Gym Buddy call me and want to work out seemed like a great thing, at first. Continue reading Gym Buddy or Insecure Cling-on?