Now that we’re drawing close to the end of another year, I’ve been thinking of all of the vacations I want to take with Match next year. I think we did a great job of getting out and exploring this year, but next year I would like to do even more. I’ve been looking at vacation Apartments for rent in Edmonton, Alberta, as well as other places in the North. I find that the further north you go, it seems like the friendlier the people. Now if I could just find some extra cash for all of this traveling we’re going to be doing next year. Maybe Santa will help me out!

Reese:Maybe we’re just going about this the wrong way. We have to think outside the box. (to Dewey) If you were a diving board, what would you want someone to do with you?
Dewey: Take me ice-skating.
Reese: Don’t be an idiot. That place is freezing, and it’s always so crowded.
Dewey: Yeah, but they have good hot dogs.
Reese: Those hot dogs suck compared to the ones at the train station.
Dewey: Why would a diving board want to go to a train station?
Reese: How should I know? Maybe he wants to visit a relative!
Malcolm: Guys? Get back in the box. -Malcolm in the Middle

After 3 years of begging, Match and I finally went ice skating.

I have to say it was worth the wait! Since Match’s schedule has changed to weekend nights, that means he has weekdays free, which translates to NO CROWDS when we go places. That was sort of an understatement when we went to the ice rink.

When we got there, we found out that we were the only people in the entire skate rink. I’ve only gone ice skating in super crowded malls and once in a very crowded outdoor skate rink in San Francisco.

This beat the pants of those other times. I’m ruined for regular skating. This was seriously the coolest thing ever. We had such a blast. We also discovered that we’re better on skates than we thought we’d be. Here’s a fun short little video I put together of our day at the rink.

We had such a blast and it was a very fun item to check off the Project 52 List. I can’t wait to go again!

Lily: I could totally let you down. Has that thought not occurred to you?
Marshall: Not even for one second. Not having a baby would suck, but the idea of you letting me down, that’s impossible.-How I Met Your Mother

My good bloggy friend IA recently wrote a post about how so many of us bloggers need to remember to get real in our posts and to take off the rose colored glasses. You guys know that normally I tell it like it is on this blog, aka my diary. But lately I’ve definitely been guilty of having the rose colored glasses. Now don’t get me wrong: I’m unbelievably happy about the new house, and everything is going fine with me and Match.

But there has been something weighing on my mind for months now, and I haven’t come clean about it with you all. Now that we’re all settled in our home it’s become harder to avoid the subject too, especially among family. At our housewarming, when we’d give the tours of the house, all anyone would say was, “So when are you going to fill this house with BABIES?” It’s a harmless question, and perfectly natural to ask two happily married people who just moved into a 4 bedroom house.

But it’s not such a harmless question to two people who have wanted little else for the past few months. Make that a whopping nine months. It was 9  months ago that on the ride home from Easter Sunday with the in-laws that Match jokingly said, “I wanna put a baby in you.” To which I laughed, oh yeah, and what if I said yes? To which he said, “No really, I’m dead serious.” That’s when we sat down and talked about starting our family.

We were so naive. We were that couple that thought it would be a first time’s a charm type of thing. I hated (still do) the word “Trying” when talking about pregnancy. I hate the idea of having to work towards something that should be so natural and easy. At first I lied to myself and said it was fine. That even though I’ve been off the pill since ’09 and Match and I have been less than careful well before “trying” that it didn’t mean anything. That we needed for Match to graduate from academy, and we still had so much to do. But then each month after that would go by and the ache in my chest would get a little bigger. I have always been a swallow my emotions and tough it up kind of person. Then we started house hunting and I focused all of my energy on that instead. Then we kept getting outbid on every house we put an offer on. Once again it felt like we were constantly getting our hopes up, only to be disappointed in the end.

It doesn’t help that everywhere I look it seems like someone else is announcing a pregnancy. I think we’re just getting to that age in our lives where it’s the natural progression. The holidays don’t help. Everywhere I go I’m reminded of children.

I will never forget the day Match broke down in tears of frustration one particularly rough evening, after yet another no came from the Realtor, and another month of “symptoms” from me turned out to all be in our my head. “I can’t give you a house, I can’t give you a baby. I feel like a failure.” I think I died a little inside that day.

But now we’re halfway there. We finally got the house. We’ve settled in, and we’re ready. We’ve even picked out the room for baby.

The rocking chair is in place; all the baby books we’ve collected over the years to read to our little one are under the window seat. I have a hard time going into that room because it’s too painful for me.

If you’re reading this and you have advice, I ask you to read the following article from thebump.com before giving it, especially if you’ve never struggled with trying to get pregnant. I have been guilty of saying many things on this list, and now that I’m in their shoes, I can’t tell you how much I wish I could take back what I’ve said.

I’m not writing this to get sympathy comments. I know so many people out there have had far harder and longer infertility struggles. But I’m just putting it out there because I need to get this off my chest. I need to be able to look back on this blog and read this to my future children. To show them just how much they were wanted. How their mommy and daddy would give anything to have their laughter fill up our home.

I’m sorry, I was looking for my apartment, but I seem to have stumbled upon some sort of magical winter wonderland instead. Why, perhaps this elf can help me. -Veronica Mars

The day after our Thanksgiving, so this past Sunday for us, Match and I grabbed Monkey and headed off to the Christmas tree farm. With our housewarming party this Saturday, I was anxious to get our halls decked in a hurry. Can you blame me? It’s our first Christmas in the new house!

Last year we just went to a local tree lot, because that’s all that was nearby. But this year we found a Christmas tree farm just 20 minutes out of town. It was so cute! They had Santa sleigh rides for kids, and free hot cocoa and cider. You could walk the farm and cut down your own tree, or choose from pre-cut trees. I snapped this picture while we were walking down Kris Kringle lane. How sweet is that father and son? I could just picture that being Match and our future little one.

We wanted to cut our own, but I have a love for pine trees, and they only had pre-cuts left. We found the perfect tree. It’s 8 feet and glorious. It’s by far the biggest Christmas tree I’ve ever had.

There was a photo opt spot and of course I made Match take pictures with me.

Here’s what the tree looked like all set up in the stand. It was sort of daunting to decorate. I had to use my step ladder for most of it!

After decorating the tree, with the help of my elf:

Match put up lights for me. It was a total suburbia moment, with two sets of neighbors across from us putting up their lights at the same time.

After a fun filled day of getting into the Christmas spirit, we finished the night off by watching holiday lights specials while drinking hot cocoa and eating ice cream. It was the perfect way to kick off the Christmas season.

Zack: Have I ever told you that you are the best headmaster in Bayside, no make that California?
Mr. Belding: Zack, I am not a matador, so take the bull outside!
Jessie: What the little brownnoser is trying to say is may we hold a carnival on school grounds to raise money for this ski trip. -Saved By The Bell

I’m totally in the Christmas spirit. My house is all decked out for Christmas and our housewarming party this Saturday (pics to come soon!). Our tree is decorated, and there are even paper snowflakes on the windows. It had me thinking of Diamond Lake, a place I’d visit with my family when I was little.

We’d stay in a cabin, go sledding, and huddle around the fireplace after a long day of playing in the snow. We would go up with other families, or with our extended family, and we had such a blast. I wish I had digital pictures of our time there, but they are all in my mom’s well organized photos shoebox so I’m spared that embarrassment.

The last time I was there I’m sad to say it was with my ex, Unemployed Guy. The place was beautiful but his craptasticness abrasivesness definitely ruined the trip for me. At least I got some great pictures of the lake and the trees. I need to go back with Match and make new memories. I’m daydreaming of visiting Diamond Lake with Match, our future kids, and our parents. Now that would be an amazing trip.