How We Told Our Friends

Malcolm: Mom, do you…do you like your parents?
Lois: It doesn’t matter how I feel about them. It’s not like I can trade them for someone else. You can’t pick your parents. You’re pretty much stuck with whoever you get.-Malcolm in the Middle

For months I’ve been thinking of fun ways to tell our friends when we finally got pregnant. We opted for different ways to tell each of our different friends. Sassy Couple found out right away since I wasn’t drinking on New Year’s Eve and she point blank guessed it! We told Walking Buddies when we were up in Tahoe together and I had to explain why I couldn’t go sledding or ice skating.

Remember a few weeks back when I blogged about Ranger Bob and getting lost on a hike with Geeky? Well that was the day I told her about Roo. So when we were lost, she just kept saying, OMG you’re PREGNANT! We have to find our way out of here! It was so cute how worried she was. She is going to be an awesome auntie.

We went out to dinner with Couple Friends and their babies and I casually mentioned that Match would be getting six weeks off this coming September. Then they looked at us, and looked at my bottle of sparkling water that was clearly not wine and they got it.

I told Monica and Chandler on skype much the same way we told our parents. It was fun to be able to get them in on a secret when they’re so far away and missing out on so much. We told them before we told many of our friends! Last week I told the rest of “The Group” including Tahoe Couple, Token Gay Guys and TomBoy via email with the picture below. They all freaked out because they’ll be aunties and uncles. We’re the first out of that group to have kids, so it marks the beginning of a new era. I promised them I would try not to change too much. 🙂

As for everyone else, we are still waiting to make the big announcement via Facebook. I have a lot of acquaintances on there, and we’re just not ready to tell everyone. I think we’ll wait for the 10 week mark. Instead of the typical sonogram picture, this is what we will be posting:

I just have to say this picture totally makes it look like I have a bigger bump than I do. I had just eaten Mexican food so it was definitely more of a food baby. It’s still pretty early so I’m not showing yet. But the boobie fairy has come to our house, much to Match’s delight. Oh we are SO those embarrassing parents already aren’t we?

TTUT-How We Told the Grandparents to Be

Dr. Leonard Green: What’s new with you?
Rachel: Um… I got TiVo!
Dr. Leonard Green: What’s TiVo?
Phoebe: It’s slang for pregnant. –Friends

Today I’m checking in with two hot mamas: Impulsive Addict and Seriously Shawn

Match and I had this grand plan to not tell people about Roo until the doctor confirmed our pregnancy. Well that scheme lasted all of four days until we were both just about to burst. So we agreed that we would only tell our parents and siblings, and then wait for the doctor for everyone else.

I wanted to do something creative, and it was Match who came up with the idea. We took two old tshirts and some puff paint and got to creating.

Mine said Baby on Board with a little arrow pointing to my belly and Match insisted his should say Who’s Your Daddy? We were both wearing the shirts when we called our parents and had them use the Skype web conferencing services with us.

In typical Mom fashion, my mom couldn’t get her side of the video to work, so we could hear her but not see her. I guess the wording on our shirts appeared backwards on her screen, and I could hear her saying, “What’s your shirt say? It’s backwards. What’s that…baby?” Then she screamed at the top of her lungs when she realized what it said. I wish we could have seen her reaction, and I made sure to tease her for it. By the time she got her video working the moment was over, but I still got to see her and my Pops grinning. They’re both so excited to be grandparents for the third time (my brother has two toddlers).

Then it came time to tell the in-laws. This I was so excited for because they will be first time grandparents. They did get the video working right away, but they also had the problem with the image being backwards. My mother in-law was so cute because I think she was afraid it was a joke, or that she’d misread it because she said tentatively, “Are you…are you pregnant?” And then when I nodded and said yes, she clapped her hands and I could see tears in her eyes.

Here’s my mom still trying to figure out the Skype on the “darn computer” she calls it.

and here’s my overjoyed in-laws. I love that I was able to catch that reaction. I know the sunglasses make them look ridiculous, but I like to hide faces when I can. But you had to see that grin!

After we were done talking to our parents, we decided we’d better tell our siblings. This was mostly because my mother-in-law was so anxious for us to tell her daughter that I was afraid she would do it. She had a hard enough time when we said she couldn’t tell her sisters until our doctor’s visit. It’s been killing her these past few weeks, and I know exactly how she feels.

So for the siblings, they didn’t want to skype and neither my brother nor Match’s sis understood why we were pestering them. So I said I was emailing them a picture of the house and to call me as soon as they got it. This is the picture they got instead, and it had our phones blowing up quick!

We had such a blast telling our immediate family. I love that we were able to capture moments of it on camera. Ideally we would have been there in person, but this was the next best thing. The next morning both our moms had emailed us bubbly emails about how excited they were. They each have unique nicknames they want to be called, which I think is so cute. I loved telling the family in our own special way. Next up…how we told our friends!

But Sock

Robin Scherbatsky: But what about all the things we talked about?
Lily Aldrin: But… but sock!
Robin Scherbatsky: What about Marshall working all the time?
Lily Aldrin: But sock!
Robin Scherbatsky: What about Project Lily?
Lily Aldrin: It’s got little fishies on it!
Robin Scherbatsky: All this discussion, and a sock makes your decision for you? –How I Met Your Mother

It was December 30th, a Thursday. I had been feeling odd all week. I wasn’t sure if it was the remnants of the cold I’d had, or what, but I felt…different. Match took this picture at our family Christmas, and I joked around and stuck my belly out. Maybe I knew subconsciously then?


I promised myself I wouldn’t test this month until I was officially late. I’ve been guilty of making up symptoms and literally pissing money away on those sticks. I actually forgot about it completely and just relaxed the entire month. The night we had friends over to the house to test out our fireplace I had three beers over the course of the evening. After everyone left I curled up on the couch and kept dozing off, even though it was early for us, not even midnight. I looked at my calendar, and realized, oh wow I’m late! So I told Match I was going to bed, and headed upstairs and took a test. I’ve peed on countless sticks, but never, never has there been even the hint of a line. So when that faint line appeared, it may as well have been a flaming red banner. My hands started shaking and I rushed downstairs. Match didn’t even know I was testing, and as a joke he asked, “so is it positive?”

I ignored him and rushed to grab the gift I had been waiting nine months to give him. A set of newborn baby socks, as an inside joke from an episode of How I Met Your Mother that we are constantly quoting. He unwrapped them and said, seriously? Then he said, “Wait, you really just took a test? How did I guess that? I don’t believe you. Show me the test!”

So we rushed upstairs and looked together. “It’s positive!” I said with tears in my eyes. “It’s positive?” He asked, “That little line? Why isn’t it darker?” So I had to explain how they worked and promised to take another tomorrow to confirm.

I barely slept that night. I kept worrying that maybe it was all in my head, that I’d imagined the whole thing. There were also about a million thoughts running through my head about pregnancy in general. Fear, anxiety, guilt about those beers and the sushi from earlier in the week, excitement, overwhelming joy. That morning I jumped out of bed and took another test. This one was a lot less ambiguous.

Then Match started getting more excited, but he was scared too. Since then I’ve peed on one more stick, on January 1st. This one became positive almost the second I put it down, and there’s no denying that line.

I’m almost 2 months pregnant (a little over 7 weeks…oh how I loathe the week counting) and it’s still a little early to be blogging about it. But we heard the heartbeat from the doctor, and well,I just couldn’t stand not blogging about it. This is my diary and it’s all I’ve wanted to write about for weeks!

 We struggled with what to nickname our baby to be. Match came up with Roo, because I’m carrying around this little one in my “pouch”. It makes me smile because I think of Kanga and Roo from Winnie the Pooh. It still doesn’t feel real. Match and I are going to be parents. I’m going to be a mama. I can’t wait to meet you Roo!!

The House Wish List

There are so many things I would love to get for our house. With the sunny weather we’ve been having, I’ve been doing a little yard work and the wish list items keep piling up. I would love to get a nice outdoor thermometer, like the cool digital ones they have at Sharper Image. I would love to line the back fence with feather grass, similar to this:

and a rock path to a little sitting area in the back of the yard. Right now our yard looks like this:

It’s a major work in progress, but I think we’ll have fun making it our own.

Talk to Us Tuesday-Deputy Wives and Drama

She’s this amazing girl one minute and then this raging jealous freak the next.-Matt, The Vampire Diaries

Today I’m checking in with my two favorite blog girl friends Impulsive Addict and Seriously Shawn. I really need an ear today guys. I’m struggling with a big issue in the world of Law Enforcement spouses: drama, trust and jealousy issues.

The other night I had Walking Buddy and another new deputy wife friend over for the evening. We were having a really great time visiting and hanging out with their babies. Everything was great, until one of the wives mentioned her fears about a coworker of our husbands. Her and Walking Buddy got all upset about their men even so much as talking to this coworker, and were really fired up about it. As they were talking, I felt like they were dragging me into their world of mistrust. They even tried to get me upset because she asked one of the husband’s for Match’s phone number.

Now I trust Match 100%. But you remember when I had to deal with the slutty girl who kept hanging all over Match during academy? So I’m familiar with that feeling of uncertainty. As the wives said, they trust their men completely, it’s the women they don’t trust. I am familiar with horrible women who prey on married men. But at the end of the day we have to trust our men don’t we?

I know Match loves me no matter what. Even if my weight balloons up and I’m shopping for plus size dresses at sydneyscloset, and I know he’ll only have eyes for me. In fact he’s been more than understanding of the guy friends I’ve had in the past. So I try to extend the same courtesy. He always tells me everything, and I never have to wonder if he’s holding back.

I’m just sad that I let these girls get to me, and made me have feelings of doubt that night. The next day I talked about it all with Match, and we were both pretty bummed out. I really like these girls, and I was hoping to become good girlfriends. But it’s hard to be around girls who are so insecure and cause so much drama. They don’t even want their husbands talking to girls at work, even though it’s part of their JOB. I think it’s important to have comradeship among his colleagues, and if that means female coworkers, so be it. He will have times where he has to depend on these people for his life, and I want to be sure they’re looking out for him.

I also think by getting mad at their husbands, these wives are inadvertently pushing their husbands to lie. They’re basically making them afraid to even mention female coworkers for fear of backlash. I don’t want Match to ever feel that he has to hold anything back from me. I don’t mind him having female friends as long as I remain his best friend. He also knows there are boundaries. Going to lunch one on one with the same female coworker all the time isn’t appropriate, but talking during their shift or hanging out in groups is just fine.

My way of dealing with this new girl is to invite her to our house for Match’s birthday next week. I feel that knowing someone keeps me from wondering about them, and usually puts all fears to rest. Hopefully these deputy wives won’t mind that she’s there.

What are your thoughts on this? Do you have friends who are insecure about their husbands and other females? How do you stop yourself from falling into the drama trap right along with them?