As specified by standards and practices, I am enjoying this hookah in a drug-free way. -Debbie, Sealab 2021

This past Sunday Couple Wife and Geeky came to visit me. They got me out of the house and out of my head for a few hours of girl time. Let me tell you-having a few hours where I could laugh, be silly, and not think solely about sad stuff was exactly what I needed.

We started off with sushi and sake at a restaurant downtown. Please don’t mind the bags under my eyes. I swear I’ve aged 10 years since the beginning of this month. I suppose that’s to be expected given the circumstance. I’m ready to feel normal again, and I know eventually my eyes will dry up.

The sake sparked some very inappropriate comments about how it was Asian men’s semen. This prompted CW to say, “If it tastes like that, maybe I married the wrong guy!” Oh lordy! Since we were on a roll with our inappropriateness, we decided to wander into the lingerie shop, Naughty or Nice. I didn’t realize there was a back part of the store, which was full of adult toys. All kinds of jokes and giggling ensued. You would think we were three teenage girls, not married women in our late 20s!

We had the most fun trying on wigs. Geeky looked amazing as a red headed vixen, and actually ended up buying hers. I loved the pixie wig, but couldn’t bring myself to drop $50 on something I’d rarely wear.

After our fun at the porn shop in disguise, we walked by a cigar shop. I decided to stop in and buy Match a cigar for being such a great husband. While we were browsing we noticed they also had a hookah bar. The girls had never smoked hookah, but I used to all the time in college. For those that haven’t tried it, it’s flavored tobacco that makes you light headed and slightly buzzed. It’s fun once in a blue moon but I couldn’t do it all the time. We were cracking up and being total dorks, blowing smoke out of our noses and being dragons as Geeky called it. It was a good thing we were the only people in the shop because we were being complete fools.

We laughed about how even though it was a girl’s day out, it was as if we’d had a guy’s day. We’d been drinking, visited a porn shop, and then a cigar lounge. The cigar lounge had
poker too, and we were tempted to add that to our list of activities. What a completely random, but fun, afternoon!

When we got home the girls presented Match with a gift they’d bought him at the porn shop-a man thong. I always tell them how cute his butt is, so they bought him a pair of undies to accentuate his “ass-ets”. He was only mildly embarrassed.

I also bought him some boobie shaped soap since he hasn’t been allowed to touch mine for awhile. Once again lots of giggling from the girls. We had such a fun, lighthearted day and it was exactly what I needed.

Malcolm: Mom, do you…do you like your parents?
Lois: It doesn’t matter how I feel about them. It’s not like I can trade them for someone else. You can’t pick your parents. You’re pretty much stuck with whoever you get.-Malcolm in the Middle

For months I’ve been thinking of fun ways to tell our friends when we finally got pregnant. We opted for different ways to tell each of our different friends. Sassy Couple found out right away since I wasn’t drinking on New Year’s Eve and she point blank guessed it! We told Walking Buddies when we were up in Tahoe together and I had to explain why I couldn’t go sledding or ice skating.

Remember a few weeks back when I blogged about Ranger Bob and getting lost on a hike with Geeky? Well that was the day I told her about Roo. So when we were lost, she just kept saying, OMG you’re PREGNANT! We have to find our way out of here! It was so cute how worried she was. She is going to be an awesome auntie.

We went out to dinner with Couple Friends and their babies and I casually mentioned that Match would be getting six weeks off this coming September. Then they looked at us, and looked at my bottle of sparkling water that was clearly not wine and they got it.

I told Monica and Chandler on skype much the same way we told our parents. It was fun to be able to get them in on a secret when they’re so far away and missing out on so much. We told them before we told many of our friends! Last week I told the rest of “The Group” including Tahoe Couple, Token Gay Guys and TomBoy via email with the picture below. They all freaked out because they’ll be aunties and uncles. We’re the first out of that group to have kids, so it marks the beginning of a new era. I promised them I would try not to change too much.

As for everyone else, we are still waiting to make the big announcement via Facebook. I have a lot of acquaintances on there, and we’re just not ready to tell everyone. I think we’ll wait for the 10 week mark. Instead of the typical sonogram picture, this is what we will be posting:

I just have to say this picture totally makes it look like I have a bigger bump than I do. I had just eaten Mexican food so it was definitely more of a food baby. It’s still pretty early so I’m not showing yet. But the boobie fairy has come to our house, much to Match’s delight. Oh we are SO those embarrassing parents already aren’t we?

[In the woods]
Adrian Monk: Are we lost? Tell me the truth, I can take it.
Natalie Teeger: We’re… [Stottlemeyer mouths, "NO!"] …not lost.
Adrian Monk: Oh, my God! WE’RE LOST! -Monk

I’ve got a doozie of a story to share with you and our fabulous hosts: IA and Seriously Shawn

On Sunday I met up with Geeky and we went to lunch and then for a short little hike. The trail we went on is about an hour long, maybe less. We lost track of time gabbing away and somehow ended up on the wrong trail. We started getting worried when we didn’t recognize the path. We kept running into bicyclists and we asked a few if we were heading in the right direction. They assured us we were headed towards the parking lot.

Then it started getting dark and we started getting worried. We found a map and it didn’t have a You Are Here sticker, but we figured we were pretty lost. I thought the other side of the sign might have some more info, and when we looked, it was a huge picture of a mountain lion with a warning to beware of mountain lions in the area.

Geeky and I took one look at the picture, let out yelps of fear and ran like hell down the hill. We finally found the parking lot the bikers had been talking about, and by some stroke of pure luck, Ranger Bob. He gave us a map and pointed to the trail that we were on. He said we weren’t just a little off trail, we were MILES away from the car. It turned out our “little hike” was more like 2.5 hours of wandering. Ranger Bob took pity on us and drove us back to our car. We were absolutely mortified/so grateful. He even had to call it in on his radio that he was taking two lost females back to the park. He also confirmed that there were indeed mountain lions right where we had been walking, and that it was a good thing we were hiking in pairs.

He also lectured us about always carrying our cell phones (we had both forgotten ours) and advised us to bring pepper spray next time. He gave us a pamphlet about how a lot of the state parks are closing and how we can help. After being rescued by Ranger Bob I’m super motivated to help out. Here’s the website if you’d like more info: www.savestateparks.org

We got back to Geeky’s and couldn’t stop laughing at ourselves. I’m sure we were quite the sight. Two blonde girls completely lost, cold, and so grateful that we ran into Ranger Bob. Geeky’s husband teased us and said the typical guy response, “You guys might have had to get naked and cuddle for warmth.” Men! I called Match on the way home and he laughed and said, “You have the worst sense of direction!” It was still a really fun day and it was great seeing Geeky. I also got some great pictures. I wish I’d thought to take one of Ranger Bob! Next time we go hike we’ll definitely bring a map, our cell phones, and pepper spray!

[after Clark fails at lighting all the exterior Christmas lights at the "lighting ceremony" in front of the entire family]
Art: [sarcastically] Beautiful, Clark.
Frances: Talk about pissing your money away. I hope you kids see what a silly waste of resources this was.
Audrey Griswold: He worked really hard, Grandma.
Art: So do washing machines. -National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation

I’m linking up with the ever fabulous: IA and Seriously Shawn

Here’s what I’ve been up to: 

• Two Sundays ago  Geeky came to visit me at our new casa. We had one of those fun girlie days, with lunch and margaritas downtown, followed by shopping, and ending with a gab sess on the couch over apple cider. I need more days like that in my life!

•  this past Saturday I returned the favor and visited Geeky and her Fire Guy. I had to drop off this little Christmas present I painted for her for her first year as a married woman. She has a thing for Cinderella.

• She got me and Match mini Korbel champagne bottles. I can’t promise that Match will get his.
• I also celebrated Couple Husband’s 30th birthday with him and his family. It was such a fun night, but for one tragedy: I forgot to bring my camera! You’ll just have to trust me that it was a great time. It was very casual, and I got to snuggle up with Couple babies.
• I went on a walk with a new friend, a wife of one of Match’s coworkers. I’ll call her Walking Buddy because I have a feeling we’ll be going on more. She’s a lot of fun and I’m so excited to have a friend that lives close by.
• We’ve also been enjoying all of the Christmas lights in our neighborhood.
• Later this week we’re going to visit Candy Cane Lane, which should have even more. I can never get enough Christmas lights and I’m a little sad that Christmas is only 5 days away. I don’t know if I’m ready for the holiday season to end.

•  Tonight Match and I are going to have a low key night. I’m making homemade Pho and spring rolls, and then we’re going to curl up on the couch and watch Christmas movies. My honey has been working massive overtime lately. I’ve forgotten what he looks like! I’m ready for some R&R with my main squeeze.
• So what’s new with you?

Jeremy: We are going to have tons and tons of opportunities to meet gorgeous ladies that are so aroused by the thought of marriage that they’ll throw their inhibitions to the wind.
John: And who’s going to be there to catch them?
Jeremy: Grab that net and catch that beautiful butterfly pal! What do you like better, Christmas or Wedding season? (raises hand)
John: Mister Grey.
Jeremy: Yes, um, the answer would be, um, wedding season?
John: Bingo. I’m gonna go get my suit. Oh, and now who are we this time? -Wedding Crashers

brought to you by: the ever Fabulous Impulsive Addict and Seriously Shawn

• Sunday was Geeky’s wedding. I’m so happy for her! It feels like just yesterday she was the guest at mine, with her Fire Guy doing the reach and trying to catch that garter. I knew then he was going to propose. And here we are just over a year later and she’s a new bride! Her wedding dress was beautiful and she was beaming the entire night. You know I totally got teary eyed when they exchanged their scott kay rings. I’m so excited that she’s joined the married club!
  
• Awkward moment happened the minute the bridesmaids walked down the aisle. For you to know this was awkward first look at the dress I chose to wear for her fall wedding.

• cute right? I loved it, and it was an absolute steal at Plato’s Closet, where I got it for 8 bucks! I emailed a cell phone pic of it to Geeky because she had mentioned her bridesmaids were wearing brown. I asked her if my dress was the same color, and if it was too similar. She said no and to definitely buy it.
• but I was regretting my bargain decision when the bridesmaids walked by wearing dresses almost identical to mine. 
• luckily Geeky didn’t care one bit. But remember bitchface girl from the bachelorette? Of course she had to say something snarky. There’s always one in a group isn’t there? I was feeling very self conscious but after the first few glasses of wine I got over it.
• The wedding was a lot of fun. It reminded me a lot of our wedding. It was at a golf course, with the ceremony outside and the reception indoors. There were a lot more people at hers though, and she had a shit ton of bridesmaids. I’m soooo glad we didn’t have any. Match and I kept joking around that it was the high price version of our wedding, since they had plated dinners and it was at a fancier building.
• Geeky sat us at a table with a super fun couple from San Francisco. We clicked with them right away and City Girl and I exchanged numbers before the night was up. I really hope we get together with them soon. They were so fun!
• Match and I danced all night. I wish I’d had someone snap photos because it’s rare that we get to dance like that. Usually Match prefers to observe while I go out there and shake my tail feathers, but he was in a really social mood. He twirled me all over the dance floor and just like at every wedding we go to, I fell in love with him all over again. I love how weddings have that effect. 
• The wedding was a ton of fun and I’m so happy for my friend. She’s such a sweet and genuine person and nobody deserves happiness more than her!