RSSTraining My Emotions
Jun 10
Birthday Twin, Funny Guy, Heart Guy, Potential Guy Men in Trees 3 Comments
We all have emotional boundaries that we set for ourselves but, all too often, we cross them. With authority and repetition, we can train animals to think and act a certain way. What about when it comes to ourselves? Can we train our emotions to sit and stay?-Marin, Men in Trees
Sunday made it exactly one week since I had last spoken to Birthday Twin. One week with not so much as a drunk dial or a text message. I was proud of myself for staying strong and waiting for him. The last time we talked, he told me that when he gets his anxiety attacks he withdraws from everyone, and that it isn’t personal. He said that when I don’t hear from him to please not be upset, and it has nothing to do with me. That doesn’t stop me from being so frustrated I could scream. It doesn’t stop me from missing him when he’s gone.
I went to church alone Sunday morning, it was only my second time going. I felt that familiar empty feeling when I watched as the couples came in, two by two. I had so much fun with BT being there last week and it really bugged me that I cared so much. I hate it when I start getting down about being alone when there are so many great things about being single. I love my independence, my freedom to do whatever I want for the day. Still, as I sat there I looked at couples holding hands, or husbands absentmindedly rubbing their wives necks while the preacher talked and I just couldn’t help thinking, I want that. I have this fabulous life, and I just want someone to share it with. I don’t think that’s much to ask. I don’t need a boyfriend, I just want one.
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