What to Do About Parents Visiting

Rachel: Oh we did, but my mom got us the greatest gift of all.
Ross: (excited) A Play-Dough Barber Shop?
Rachel: No. She’s going to live with us for eight weeks.
Ross: Uh, what?
Rachel: Yes! She’s gonna help us take care of the baby! Woo-hoo. (Sees that Ross isn’t happy.)
Ross: What—You’re not serious. I mean she’s a very nice woman, but there is no way we can take eight weeks of her. She’ll drive us totally crazy. -Friends

With the much anticipated arrival of our little one, the subject of my parents visiting has come up. Now, as some of you may recall, our last visit was a bit rough, especially towards the end. My parents are not the best travels, and don’t do well on long trips. A week was just too long for them, and combined with all the work they did, it was no wonder we were all tired and cranky by the end of the visit.

I’d really like to avoid a repeat of that experience, and so I’m not sure what to do. Of course I want my parents to meet their grandson, and I know they are so excited about it. But they’re also struggling a bit financially, and they’re not sure if they can take off work to make the trip. So I’ve been toying with the idea of us coming to them, with a newborn.

Is it crazy? Maybe. Or it might be pretty great as well. I’ve been researching hotel offers that are along the drive, so we could split it up into two days. That’s only about 4 hours in the car each day. The other option is to meet them in Medford, which is only a 2 hour drive, and a 6 hour drive for us. We have family there they could stay with, and Match, Piglet, Monkey and I can check into a hotel. I like the idea of being on neutral ground, where my mom wouldn’t be hovering too much. If she comes here, she will try to help, but in doing so she sometimes makes things worse. Like when they were here, and she tried to vacuum, and nearly broke our expensive Dyson, and insisted it was the vacuum’s fault! Also, with the other family members there, they might act as a buffer and help reign her in when she gets too controlling over the baby.

I know it’s going to be challenging no matter what we decide. The relationship between mother and daughter is a complicated one, and even more so when it comes to babies. My mom thinks that she knows everything, and doesn’t believe some of the new advice from doctors, like how babies should only sleep on their backs (she says stomach, EEK!) and argued with me that babies should be fed water when they’re newborns. Lord give me strength! So I’m hoping we can work something out with Match’s schedule, and maybe make the trip to Oregon. It might be a great break for us to get away from the heat down here, and from what I hear, newborns are pretty easy to travel with, easier than toddlers anyhow.

What are your thoughts my lovely been there done that moms? Have you traveled with a newborn before?