Investments for Dummies

Bart: How could you make me Baby Stink-Breath and not even tell me?
Homer: I was going to tell you on my deathbed.
Marge: Honey, you did have a great time doing those commercials, and you made a lot of money.
Bart: I did? Where is it?
Marge: Your father invested it in the college trust fund which, today, must be worth a fo…
Homer: La la la la la la la la la!
Marge:[groans in embarrassment] Of course, the stock market’s been down lately, but their must be some sort of…
Homer:[continues rudely interrupting Marge] La la la la la la la la nothing left la la la oh.
Bart: You spent all the money I earned?
Homer: I needed it. I had to buy back some incriminating photos. Look.
[Flips through photos of Homer holding Bart over a railing]
Homer: See, you’re fine, and then, whoops! Uh-oh! Look out! Oh! I know this looks bad but if you reverse it, daddy’s a hero. See? Watch… I saved you- The Simpsons

I think I need to read a book about investments for dummies. I have this 401K from my old job and I need to reinvest it somewhere else. The problem is I have no idea what to do with it. I’m a little bit paranoid about Stock Trading because the stock market is so volatile. I want to be sure my money doesn’t disappear because I invested in some company that goes belly up. If I did decide to do any Online Trading I would definitely speak with an Online Broker before any Mobile Trading I would do. I may just put the 401K into one of my existing IRA Accounts and just leave it there, as long as it’s gaining interest. I just want to be smart with my money for our future.

Do you have a 401k? Do you invest in the stock market? Or do you just shove it all under your mattress?

Your comments make my day!