Mark: Let me guess, you and Meredith are back together and you’ve been up all night doing the horizontal salsa.
Derek: Mambo. Horizontal mambo. Meredith and I, we’re just friends.
Mark: Sexy friends. –Grey’s Anatomy
Match and I have this running joke that he has a tendency to stick his foot in his mouth at times. He doesn’t mean to; but sometimes he just says things that come out all wrong. Usually they cause laughter, but sometimes they can cause little arguments. Luckily Match and I can both laugh about his awkwardness.
The day after Thanksgiving, Match and I met up with Chandler and his older brother for a couple of drinks and a few games of shuffle board. Match and Chandler’s brother were at one end, with Chandler and me at the other. While we were playing, a fairly drunk girl came up to Match and started talking to him about the game.
It was pretty obvious to me and Chandler that this girl was hitting on Match. Academy has done wonders for Match’s already toned physique and I don’t think he realizes just how hot he looks. Well this girl noticed. At first it was funny because she was sort of stumbling around and blocking our play. After a few minutes of Match talking to her, it started to get annoying. I looked at Chandler and he just shrugged.
I knew Match wasn’t flirting, but he wasn’t giving her the go away signals either. I decided to blow him a kiss in hopes of helping him get an out from this girl. Unfortunately he didn’t see the kiss, but she did. She turns to him and says, “Oh, do you know each other?” And he says, “Yeah, we’re all friends here.”
Not, that’s my wife and these are my friends. Just, “We’re all friends here.” That’s the point where Chandler goes, “Oh MAN! You are an ASS!” and starts busting up. Match looks all innocent and says, “what what did I do?” The drunken girl stumbled away and Match came over for a hug when he saw my eyes shooting him daggers. Chandler just shook his head and laughed. When Match tried to kiss me I said, “Oh no, I thought we were all friends here!” Comprehension finally dawned on Match on how that must have looked and sounded and he gave a sheepish grin and said, “I wasn’t even thinking about that, I was just trying to play shuffle board. I didn’t know she was hitting on me.”
He’s lucky I wasn’t in a more fiesty mood. Instead I just laughed and shook my head. “Babe you really are dense when it comes to women aren’t you? That girl was totally hitting on you. And for the record, always, always claim your wife.” Then I punched his arm and said, “Got it friend?”
We’ve gotten to the point where we call each other friend around the house now. We retold the story to Match’s parents when we got back from the bar that night. Match’s dad laughed and said, “Oh you really messed up! It’s a good thing there are already twin beds in the guest room or you’d be on the couch!” 🙂