My First Alterations Appointment and The Tiny Titties

Ross: All right, all right. We’re all adults here. There’s only one way to resolve this. Since you saw her boobies, I think, uh, you’re gonna have to show her your peepee.
Chandler: You know, I don’t see that happening.
Rachel: C’mon, he’s right. Tit for tat.
Chandler: Well, I’m not showing you my tat. –Friends

I had my first alterations appointment a few weeks ago. It was so exciting seeing my dress again and knowing this is MY dress. When I put the dress on, the first thing I noticed is that it was a lot bigger than I remembered. The seamstress said she can take it in, but I should try not to lose much more. I tried getting the dress in a smaller size and they didn’t have one available. So instead, alterations are costing a small fortune!

It was hard to be mad about the cost though, because I’m proud of myself for losing the inches. The seamstress (an adorable little Asian woman who was too sweet) tutt tutted at me like I’d been on diet products or something. I told her I’m doing the P90X workout and I’m just toning up. She kept saying I looked perfect and I laughed and told her they must pay her to tell customers that!

One unfortunate side effect of toning up is my tiny titties. They were never very big, and they’ve shrunk even more with working out. The seamstress was trying to be polite while working on the bust of the dress. Finally she looks at me and says, “You push boobies UP!” I was trying so hard not to laugh as I explained to her that I had nothing to push up. So she tells me to wait a minute and comes back with not just one sew in cup, but two. She had me put them in my dress and ta-da, instant ta-tas. πŸ˜‰ I need these bad boys sewn into all of my clothes!

She also talked me into getting a slip that adds a flare to the skirt of my dress. I’m more in love with it than when I first tried it on. I can’t wait for you guys to see it!

7 Comments

    Michele

    HAHAHA girl I cannot be laughing at work! But it’s a Friday, so maybe they’ll just think I’m delirious.

    Congrats on losing the inches! Such a great feeling. I’m sure your dress is going to look amazing!

    (Ps when I got all my work skirts taken in at the beginning of the summer, my Asian seamstress was very upset too. Everytime we measured how much one needed to be taken in, she would exclaim, “3 inches!” “5 inches!!!!”)

    E

    Congrats on the trimming up — but sorry it’s going to cost you more for your dress now πŸ™ Its going to be beautiful though!! Can’t wait to see it! And I understand I have 0 boobs as well lol. Maybe thats our curse of being short?

    Brittany E.

    Yay congrats on inches lost. But I totally used my wedding dress as an excuse not to diet because then what would I do if I didn’t fit. Ugh I have small boobs too. I so get it, but I kinda like it that way! They big ones just seem to get in the way!

    One of The Guys

    The title of the post was funny enough, but the whole thing cracked me up. I can just see the Asian woman flitting around trying to be professional.

    Nothing wrong with “tiny titties.” I’m sure you look fabulous in your dress!

    shortmama

    I will take the smaller boobs over the extra inches!

    phoebe

    tooooo funny. i’m sure you look fabulous in your dress πŸ™‚

    Charlotte

    LOL!!!! You are too funny. That must have been a very interesting alteration. But YAY for insta-boobs! πŸ™‚

Your comments make my day!