Karen: So, how they hangin’, honey?

Candy: Well, thanks to Dr. Kipper, three inches higher. Listen. As much as I’d love to stay here sweatin’ with the oldies, I’m getting a little woozy from the booze-y seeping from your enlarged pores.

Karen: Oh, honey, they’re not enlarged. They’re just in shock over that hair color. -Will & Grace

So last weekend when I was out to lunch with Couple Wife we got to talking about our hair. I have natural blonde hair, but the more erm..”honey colored” hair. Which means that in the summer it looks great, with all of these natural highlights from the sun making it shine. But in the winter, it gets dull and lifeless, and that’s where the dreaded “dirty dishwater” nickname comes in. Sadly, it is so true. So I told her I was actually thinking about going brunette. (more…)

Dick: I’m sure you can defeat a simple door lock.

[Tommy breaks through the window with his hand and unlocks the door]

Dick: What are you doing?! Now this is breaking and entering! It’s illegal!

Tommy: What’d you expect me to do? Beam you in? -3rd Rock From the Sun

So Saturday night was girl’s night out with Couple Wife and two of her friends. We met up at this bar in town that’s kind of a chic cabana style bar. It’s all done up in tropical decor, and smells like coconuts when you walk in. It’s even a little bit humid to add to the ambiance. I imagine it’s what a bar in cancun hotels would be like. I was nervous at first about what the girls would think of me. I’d met them both twice before, once at CW’s baby shower, and once again at her Prom party, but we never talked. We mingled, but I never actually had a conversation with them. These girls are always dressed to the nine, makeup perfect, not a hair out of place, so I was nervous! (more…)

[to Nick's suggestion of studying for an upcoming history test] Hey man, bag the books. What’s to study? Christopher Columbus checked this place out. Now we’re here. -Rex, The Adventures of McGee and Me

Do you ever find that you fall asleep when you’re trying to study, but the minute you stop studying you’re wide awake again? What is that? Educational narcolepsy? If that’s a real thing I’ve definitely got it. I’ve been studying for my midterms most of the day, and it’s incredibly boring. I think I mentioned that I’m taking a Windows command line class and a networking class. Not exactly the most exciting of subjects. (more…)

Jules: You can’t wear fake nails on just one hand, it makes you look like a crazy whore.
Laurie: I only had four left and this is the hand I smoke with. -Cougar Town

I just have to say, the simple act of someone inviting me to join in an activity can make my day. With the move and our crazy schedule, Match and I haven’t had much time for fun in the last few weekends. So when Couple Wife texted me that she wanted to see the new place today I was thrilled to have her over. We ended up going out to lunch, and she said she’s been really craving a girl’s night out, and asked if I would like to join her and her girlfriends. (more…)