Life Without a Safety Net

When you’re young, your whole life is about the pursuit of fun. Then, you grow up and learn to be cautious. You could break a bone or a heart. You look before you leap and sometimes you don’t leap at all because there’s not always someone there to catch you. And in life, there’s no safety net. When did it stop being fun and start being scary? -Carrie, Sex and the City

Last night I went on my second date with The Potential Guy. It’s funny-he looked even more good looking than he did when I first met him. I noticed that his eyes are brown but they are circled with green. He just has this interesting look that made me happy he was taking me out. The thing I like the most so far with him is how positive his energy is. He just makes me laugh and grin the whole time we’re hanging out. I forget to be nervous, I forget anything but having a good time.

We went to a cute little Mexican restaurant and we were served by a guy named Jesus.When he brought us our food, we both looked at his name tag and grinned. PG said, well if Jesus brought it, it’s gotta be good. I thought I was the only one who found that name funny. I know it’s a cultural thing, but being a Christian, it still makes me giggle.

After dinner and cocktails at my favorite wine bar, we went back to my place. Even though I had a great time with him, I still couldn’t tell if he was attracted to me. That’s when he mentioned his love for the smell of vanilla which just happens to be my perfume. He said of all the smells out there, vanilla drives him wild. And then he kissed me. It was one of those kisses that makes your toes curl. The kisses quickly escalated, and before I knew it we were full blown making out. I guess it’s kind of ironic that his nickname is PG, because it was definitely headed to rated R. We stopped and talked about where to draw the line, and he respectfully didn’t even attempt to push the limit. I let him stay the night, and we cuddled and laid in bed talking and laughing till the wee hours.

I had a great time with him, but I some trouble sleeping. I guess it’s like the quote about being scared. I can really see myself falling for Potential, and I could easily see him breaking my heart. I’m really scared of putting myself out there again. I’m not quite sure I’m ready to take that plunge without the safety net. I guess it’s all about baby steps. I’m in no hurry to get hurt.

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